One of my goals this year has been to blog more regularly. I’ve not exactly hit the ground running (oh? it is February already? Hmmm…)
Ahem, one of my goals this spring is to start blogging more regularly. There, that’s better.
Joking aside, I do intend to write more here. It will be a mix of more philosophical posts (like the one below) and highly practical ones (get shit done! do more magic!). If you’re not already on my mailing list, you can sign up on circlethrice.com and get all of this delivered directly to your inbox. Which is good because I’m no longer cross-posting to any social media.
So, what if you can’t fix everything?
The Jungian asked me this question over Christmas and it elicited a… well, a strong response. You’d think it would be obvious right? No person can fix everything. Not everything in their lives, and not everything in the world. Rationally, I understand that. But emotionally, the idea that I can’t just fix things is upsetting to me. Very upsetting. Existentially upsetting.
This is, of course, why I continue to engage with my Jungian. Because we keep finding these hidden demons (shadows in Jungian parlance) and dragging them out into the light. It’s not always pleasant, but it’s good and necessary work. Plus I discover that the scariest of shadows can actually be powerful allies when you engage with them correctly.
My own personal Chiron return process aside, this made me think more about the work I do with clients. I asked the Jungian how he thinks about the work we do together. Is it fixing? He said no, that fixing implies brokenness and he sees the work we do as healing. He also sees his role as facilitating my own healing process rather than him healing me.
I spent quite a bit of time just sitting with this. Why is healing better than fixing? Healing is an ongoing process. Think about it. My body is healing itself right now. So is yours. It does it when you are sick or injured, but it also does it just as a matter of course. Nature is the same. Despite the terrible things we do to it, the natural world continues to attempt to rebalance and heal itself. Because it’s a process, it’s something we are always engaging in and with. My healers are all in an engaged process with me.
The reason that this was so powerful for me is that I too have the privilege of working with my clients in a helping capacity. And I’m certainly not ‘fixing’ them. In fact, my clients are some of the most amazing people, doing amazing things to reenchant their lives and the world. Of course, I also don’t see my work with clients as ‘healing’. Healing is a sacred calling and a blessed vocation… but it’s not my vocation. I benefit from the amazing healing of others (like Nate Binford and Gordon White) but healing is not my calling.
So what it is I do?
I’m solving.
Solving is what I do. And like my Jungian, I’m not solving FOR my clients… I’m facilitating their own solving. I help people by helping them solve the puzzles and problems and challenges that they have in manifesting their values through amazing magical goals.
It’s a powerful reframe of one of my core values and by burning need to help others in this way. By shifting away from the compulsive (and trauma-born) need to fix everything, I can see more clearly the role I play. With clients, but also in the world and my life. I worked to make a change in how I am in the world. I solved a problem for myself.
The process of solving doesn’t end does it? At least not until we end. And that’s very empowering really. No matter where (or when) you are in your life, you can step into this process: reframe a situation to support your growth, put yourself on a new path, make changes that make sense to you.
I wanted to kick off the year (er, I mean the spring) by sharing this reminder that we can change and make change. I think it’s more valuable now than ever, as we are entering a time of increased chaos, lessened opportunity, and challenging choices.
“A process cannot be understood by stopping it. Understanding must move with the flow of the process, must join it and flow with it.” ~Frank Herbert, Dune
